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Cath and John's son and daughter-in-law got together when they were very young, and they had three children under school age while still in their teens. Both parents were involved in drink and drugs, and they struggled with parenting.
They paid the rent, but then, when through no fault of their own, the young family was left homeless, social services became involved. Although Cath and John were young grandparents still in professional jobs, they also put in a lot of hours helping with childcare, and gave the couple as much financial support as they could.However, the volatile relationship between the young parents was rapidly disintegrating. Looking back, Cath feels she and John should have acted sooner and dug their heels in about taking the three children to live with them then. "We thought we were well-educated people, but we were not clever enough to deal with the situation when we got home from holiday to find there had been a crisis and the children had been taken into care because they were judged to be at risk." They never found out what the perceived risk was.Cath and John were willing to change their lives and look after their grandchildren full-time, but despite three court hearings where they sought the right to have the little ones live with them, their offers were rejected.Within months, the children had been adopted – split between two families far away from their home in West Yorkshire – and Cath and John have, for the last eight years, had to console themselves with exchanges of Christmas cards sent via an intermediary. No photos, birthday cards or letters are allowed.
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